It’s a skill that can save — and make — your business lots of money

Much has been written about the value of networking in finding a job or enhancing your career. The challenge for most people is understanding how to get started, especially if you are shy by nature and have difficulty approaching others. I will share a method that I have taught in my workshops over the past few years.

Before you set out to have networking conversations, create stories about yourself that prepare you to communicate information about yourself in “right-sized” snippets. If you are shy, this preparation is even more critical for, if done properly, it will allow you to have conversations without being overwhelmed by anxiety and fear.

Begin by writing down your interests, abilities, and values. Make a simple list of interests. The list doesn’t have to be long. Also list what you value in life and in others. Finally, what are your demonstrated strengths?

The best way to develop a list of your demonstrated strengths is to start by listing things that you have accomplished in your jobs or your life that you are proud of, or have received recognition for. Accomplishments related to a job or community service are preferable. Those involving hobbies may also be appropriate. Under each accomplishment, brainstorm a list of abilities or traits that you demonstrated in achieving this accomplishment. This list could include such things as: leadership, analytical skill, conflict resolution, teaching skill, perseverance, attention to detail, enthusiasm, dependability, teamwork, and so on. A friend or family member can help come up with descriptors. Lists of such traits that will help you find the right words are readily available through Internet sites that give resume-writing tips.

Try to list at least three, but do as many accomplishments as you can, with associated traits. You can add more later as you think of them. Be liberal in declaring something an accomplishment. You can always delete it later. Performance reviews from your job are a great source of ideas. The great thing about this approach is that any abilities that you claim will be based on proven results, thereby enhancing the validity of the claim.

Once your list is done, write down the story of how each accomplishment came to be. What exactly did you do? How did your participation make a difference? Write the story so that you are the hero. Now simplify the story so that it can be told in two to four minutes, including the background. This will be more challenging than it sounds, for the key to an effective personal ability story is that it is not too long, but it conveys the important information. It is easier to ramble on than it is to be concise. Mark Twain once said in a letter to a friend, “I would have made this letter shorter, but I didn’t have time.” Write down what you want from a job, promotion, or career change.

The writing part of this technique is important because writing forces you to organize your ideas and think in complete sentences, and facilitates recall. Now practice telling your stories out loud and answering questions about yourself, and doing so in two-to-four minute segments. You must practice out loud in order to smooth out your delivery, check the length of your answer, and imprint the information in your brain. Do it over and over — and over. You will be rewarded with greater confidence and a deeper understanding of yourself.

If this sounds like preparing for a job interview, well — it is! Once you know what to say about yourself and are able to say it smoothly, you will be ready to initiate networking conversations with confidence and you will make the kind of impression that you want to make.

Gene Young is an instructor of management in the College of Business at Oregon State University.